1 Answer. This happened a few times until I fit woke him up to tell him it was time to go to the hospital. Know your own limitations. So, instead of trying to take control of everything, just wait for them to accept that they have a problem and need help. Here are 10 ways of dealing with an alcoholic husband: Wondering how you should be dealing with an alcoholic husband? I've tried explaining this to him, but he . Well, after 21 years we are still happily married and you have to realize that you have to take the good with the bad. Youve done this before. Woodward said the labor was moving fast and about 15 minutes later, the baby had arrived, even before paramedics had arrived on the scene. I would also say that 5+ drinks make a person more than "buzzed." My husband to me, You are loosing it. I HAVE to join in here. I havent let him live that down. Finally he gets into town, horses and all in the hospital parking lot, smelling like a branding! I was scared. He passed out in my bed (I was in the chair) and proceeded to puke. However, he also started to diet right around the same time, so I think that helped. Every birthday growing up I heard about the stupid thing my Dad did when I was born. The next contraction, I look over to see him asleep. I beleive that 4th pregnancy has got to be my last. Then I asked him to wake our 3-year-old and get him ready for daycare. Needless to say, he was NOT happy about that statement but I don't care. Even if they "handle their liquor well" they are drunk at that point. I hope you haven't given up on this post. From what you've posted, your H has a serious problem. If you can't reach your doctor or midwife, go to the emergency room. The *only* reason I left the room when she was in labor was to go to the bathroom. I am so thankful and blessed I dont have a story to share like this. In order to do you, you might push your husband to loneliness, which eventually will lead to far more serious issues than now. He called the hospital and they said theyd call him as soon as anything happened. I don't know if this has impacted on the way I hold my emotions, but I tend to really bottle everything up until it all becomes too much - even then though it's VERY difficult to communicate any angst or anything that's bothering me. Every year, nearly 9,000 women in the U.S. go into labor and, unable to make it to the hospital, have an unplanned or unattended birth at home or in the car on the way to the hospital. The worst expectation you as a wife to an alcoholic husband may have is to expect a change overnight. He was drinking coffee, eating breakfast and taking care of the dogs because they were going to be caged up all day. This will enable you to stay focused and prevent you from giving in to temptation. While having my first son, I tore from one end to the other. Hours later on July 28, Emily Jacobs, a 28-year-old . I would be wasted if I had 5 drinks. -Jessica, My husband unabashedly complained about a canker sore while I was in labor. Not only is he really annoying when buzzed, which will piss me off and make my pain and anxiety higher, but he can't drive! Jaime Clark didn't feel contractions with her first baby, either. Sure, hopefully, the baby will change everything, but you still need to speak up to help him see the problem with this behavior and offer to support him as he works to change it. I sincerely wish you luck this will not be an easy road, but I hope you both find the strength you need for the sake of your baby. LOL, you sound like my wifes ex. I gotta say my husband was good in the delivery room, but I have a whole piece written up about the birth of our 1st, which includes a lot more crap he pulled like hitting every pot hole on the way from out apt to the hospital in Midtown but its way longer than a blog post & when I tried to publish it no one was interested. Around 2am, I heard the scraping of a badly manoeuvred BBQ onto the deck and felt my husband flop down beside me into the bed. First baby: Yes. Yep, I was 8.5 cm when we checked in to the hospital). I turned to my husband and asked him to grab me a snack out of our bags. I shoot him a look and he says oh, I thought you would drive. I was 7cm dilated when they checked me in. Not only is he really annoying when buzzed, which will piss me off and make my pain and anxiety higher, but he can't drive! Lucky for him, he was standing just out of my reach. So, I felt it and tried to ignore it. Whats worse is that his parents brought him back to the hospital drunk as a skunk. The best way to cope with your stress and maintain a positive attitude is to stay focused on your goals and avoid situations that may trigger the urge to drink. Miscarriage @ 6w3d in December 2009. http://s9.photobucket.com/albums/a71/heysupnatalie/?action=view. Someone needs to tell them it is not helpful to say things likeHere we go. and This looks like a big one.. men are so egomaniacal in general. took a look and her and said he was glad it was over and that she looked like a spider monkey. I Just know I need someone calm and sober with me when labor starts, not someone with booze breath. Having. around 9 he came to bed, moved me over and tried to go to sleep. The men or the women that married men like the ones referenced in the comments? Around 3am I felt a twinge. He didn't drink for the majority of my pregnancy, but then went out to a work function and came home wasted (he was driven home by a coworker). He still occasionally takes a beer, glass of wine or a rye down to the office when he's doing paperwork, but occasionally is the key word here. This isnt going to happen. One suggestion was to bring food just in case I delivered in the middle of the night and the cafeteria was closed (everyone said Id be STARVING after delivery). It will make the recovery process much easier for you both if both of you work together towards the same goal. And in the US, up to thirty-eight million people have an alcohol addiction at some point in their lives. ? -Anne, When the nurses asked how bad the pain was from 1-10 and I said 10, my husband said oh, come on it cant be that bad. I was furious! Now, no matter how many babies you have given birth to, you still never quite remember the feeling of going into labour until it actually happens again. Hubby went home to get a good nights rest the night I got induced. It's not much to ask for him to give up drinking for a couple of weeks or to just tone it down to a couple just in case so that he can still drive ina pinch. Go figure! Or even if it wasnt, theres still a little bit of schadenfreude involved isnt there? My husband told me to breathe. Get real, people. When she left, my husband says to me, very sweetly and earnestly, Ive had many epidurals, and I just want you to know, it doesnt feel ANYTHING like a bee sting. Its not that hard.. He was about 4 minutes from the hospital but after 20 minutes he stillhadnt shown up. My water broke in the middle of the night, we made our way to the hospital and once we arrived i was put in a wheel chair, wheeled into the elevator and left unable to walk because of pain while my husband went to find a free parking spot. With our first child, he made me wait until the show Charlies Angels was done before leaving for the hospital. Jackass. Luke decided it was his moment to shine. It's too much. Yes, keep telling her that labor will sober him right up, and that he has to sit in the waiting room if he is buzzed, because that's totally the right answer. While I was in labor, sweating like a pig and hooked up to every wire imaginable with waaaay too many things up my vag, he sat back in a chair and said wow, Im really comfortable in this chair. Ummm Im so glad for you!! Boo freaking hoo! Amy Dickinson. Here are 12 Natural Ways to Induce Labor. Lydia Swortzel, 36, went into labor at 21 weeks with identical twins after seven years of infertility. I felt bad,infact still feeling vexed, Mine did the same thing I had to send my pap out to go buy my undies, Thats why I called my girlfriend to go buy underwear for me, cant trust men with that. I watched a CSI marathon the entire time I was in labor. As a writer at Marriage.com, she is a big believer in living consciously and encourages couples to adopt this principle in their lives too. I have to admit, my husband is a trooper in regards to labor and delivery, absolutely wonderful. When we had our first child, I was nesting like mad crazy the night before (I was in labor, and my house had to be clean for my mom). With our third i forgot something to wear home and baby outfits so he had to go shopping for me and lets just say men DO NOT know how to shop for women or babies!!! I would talk to him on a day he doesn't work like people said, and maybe keep a taxi service on speed dial. Life with an alcoholic husband is tough. Suffer. He moved there from the recliner when I got up to walk down the hall to get myself a drink. Labor was a piece of cake until they broke my bag of waters. I had a go-bag ready with food, water and phone numbers. The husband was just getting off work when we found out I needed the surgery (4 weeks early with twins). Even if this method doesn't work, it's a great way to relieve stress and keep your body strong for the . HELLO! Im sure there are a ton of great husbands/partners out there. husband drunk when i went into labor 2022. rpi women's hockey: schedule. Take their thoughts and opinions into consideration before you make any decisions. It was her birthday and 12 days from her due date, her hubby had a few drinks and she went to the bathroom and her water broke. "Put. So not only did my husband eat an Indian take-away while I was in the throws of labour, he told me my hair looked a mess. The following is an exclusive excerpt of Goodbye, Sweet Girl: A Story of Domestic Violence and Survival, a new memoir by Kelly Sundberg (available June 5). She told all of the nurses to shut up and leave as she recovered. Unless yo ass is imoan. Prodromal labor can last all day and into the night before stopping for a few hours. Yeah right. LOVED reading all of the stories I thought mine was rare He will NEVER live that down. Mines more funny than bad: I went to the hospital 7 weeks early and had an emergency c-section because of HELLP syndrome. Yeah, you know, cause he was the one up since 5 am working on pushing a 10 pound baby out of his body. My first child was early and I had a long hard 19 hour labor. since the 4th month. Because, he was a little bit tired. Not during labor, but our almost 10 pound baby ended up in the NICU for low oxygen saturation. He went home to sleep in our bed so he could get some rest. With my 1st son, my husband wanted to take a shower before we left for the hospital. He tried to Mapquest the directions while driving down the highway and almost killed us. All I can think of is - How in the world did you get pregnant? Then he gets home and wants a couple more glasses of wine. After a long labor and birthing a 10 lb baby naturally, my husband, told me that the room smelled like a deer was gutted in it. Sylvia Smith loves to share insights on how couples can revitalize their love lives in and out of the bedroom. Sylvia believes that every couple can transform their relationship into a happier, healthier one by taking purposeful and wholehearted action. Wondering how to deal with an alcoholic spouse? Now, I love Firefly, but I will forever associate Captain Malcolm Reynolds saying I swear by my pretty floral bonnet, I will end you with the start of the worst pain of my life. Promote a quicker postpartum recovery. So, the advice here is to keep away from the situation and let things happen. Get Mommy Shorts updates sent directly to your inbox! When the July 14, 2012 due date of Gainesville, Florida resident Melissa Hoh came and went, her husband's friends told him about a news story they'd read in 2006 about three women going into labor . Luckily, my own husband was a peach! DH is not allowed to drink at all right now..my life and his unborn child are going to be in his hands when he drives me to the hospital. Of course, I ended up delivering at 230 AM and when I asked for something to eat, the doctor told me Id have to wait until the cafeteria opened. What else am I supposed to do?-Tina, In the delivery room, my husband went into hypoglycemic shock because he hadnt eaten in 48 hours. The. A simple rule for when to go to the hospital for labor is the 5-1-1 rule. Lol! But for nearly a week, some women, including Lauren, gave birth . Guess who is going to be taking care of the baby all night through? I was asking in honor of my pregnant sister (aka Dr. B) and planning on posting some watch-outs for my very nervous brother-in-law before the big event. The longer you hide your head in the sand the bigger the issue will get. Thank you TokenI think im in love with you! He says to her Oh, the hospital said theyd call me as soon as anything happened As he was saying the words he knew hed made a mistake. This can help you deal with issues and challenges more easily and effectively. He ran away because he said he had business at work he had to attend to. It also happened to be the night of our annual street party. Im straight, but if I ever go into labor Ill probably wish I had a wife. Away." In hindsight, I love having pictures from the delivery room. He drinks every night. July 2015 Answer . ** Babies shouldn't be born wit thangs ** Then, after I finally pushed my baby out (an hour and a half of pushing), he complained about being exhausted. How to Induce Labor the Right Way. Why do I remember the date so well? Many people told me that being induced would be really difficult, long, and painful. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. When I told my boyfriend it was time to go, he said he needed to take a shower and shave. I had trauma to the right side of my abdomen and hip area, have muscle spasms in the regular to this day, five years later, and my incision looks crazy. If your husband is an alcoholic, make every effort to avoid situations that are triggers for drinking. This message, when put right, will force them to be in their best mood despite being overly drunk. Sexuality has nothing to do with a persons character or supportiveness. Besides, alcoholic people need reasons to blame people for their condition. Sure having a bonfire or watching a big game with the buddies and having that many once and a while is no big deal, but being unable, or unwilling, to stop drinking heavily on a regular basis should be a huge red flag. I wouldnt have had more babys with a guy who could care less that I was having the first.. How could you have any more kids with someone after that are u crazy. At 7 am, doctor broke my water. Ignore your husband's alcoholism and start getting used to doing things as a single parent. Youre not to take it and should face it with confidence. The only way to stop this from happening is to let your husband know that you wont tolerate any unacceptable behavior of theirs under any circumstances. Can he be trusted to take care of your LO when he's drinking that heavily? , around 2% of adults globally have a drinking problem thats over one billion people! Alcoholism is a serious addiction that can affect both the addict and those around them. Sis takes me to the hospital and gets hold of husband. I know you don't want to hear this, but you really need to read up on alcoholism. You have much bigger issues and should seriosly consider looking into alanon. When he got home, he dropped his phone in a stock pot that was soaking in the sink. Try to apeal to the protector in him and let him know how much you need him there. Yes, by all means continue defending your drunk husband because he's dumb and he has to drink because of his job. I gave birth to our baby in our house on our bed till i was discovered by his fifteen year old niece. It also gives you a sense of control and confidence when you are working with your husband or partner on recovery. Ouch. You should also try to increase your intake of healthy food and exercise regularly, as this will help you stay healthy both physically and mentally. I dont want to deal with your stink and neither do the doctors and nurses! Sadly, this will only make things worse and nothing else. LOL, I love that Firefly episode! Many, many people struggle with this same issue, and there is help available if he chooses to use it. She thought it might go away. He came back to the hospital with a thong. I can't believe the ridiculously stupid things being said to defend alcohol abuse here. Camera. The only way to stop this from happening is to let your husband know that, you wont tolerate any unacceptable behavior. After threats, and having my parents call and force him to drive back. He's turning 30 - his birthday isn't some magical day where responsibilities don't apply to him I'm currently TTC and my husband already knows that he isn't getting drunk during my entire final month (36 weeks on) unless there is a plan for someone else to drive me. Imagine youre married to an alcoholic husband who drinks daily and beyond the limit, only to create a nuisance later. Normally, contractions begin before the water breaks. It's your body's way of protecting your baby . E had a little trouble at first and I needed stitches, so DH stayed with us until 2am before he ran home to let our dogs out to go to the bathroom and he never did tell me if he needed to clean anything up while he was there! My hubby has a habit of drinking a lot (over 5 drinks in an evening) after a rough day at work, and I'm worried I'll go into labor, and he'll be extremely buzzed. Another call revealed him sitting at home, eating a sandwich, and checking on his World of Warcraft real quick. Start by selecting which of these best describes you! He was only slightly better with our third. 9. He was much better with our sons birth though even cleaned up after me when I puked in the basin I still hold that first time against him though! So my dad went bowling. Nesting. My husband has never gotten a drivers license so I had to drive us the 25 minutes to the hospital while dealing with early contractions. And then figured hed take care of some business while he was on the line. He came home around 5 when my contractions were about 2 minutes apart and proceeded to watch tv and eat dinner. When it comes to how to live with an alcoholic husband, try not to make any major decisions without getting input from your spouse or partner first. The doc said that was waaaaay too much and really unhealthy. This classic, tell-tale sign of labor can appear as a big gush, or it can happen in a slow, light stream. This went on all day. Is this the best way though? Driving drunk is a big effing deal. You'd like to get my newsletter! My hubby is a talker, too. (this part was planned, hospital rule, only 2 in the delivery room besides the mom- so her mom and I attended) I was mentally exhausted by the time the baby was born at 6:44 pm. He works, he goes out with friends, and when OP asks him to be around or spend more time with her, he tells her to get her own friends. Children should be seen, and heard, and believed. The following morning my husband went home to get his sugar meter (he is diabetic) that he forgot. Based on our calculations, the due date for our first child fell during my husband's biggest meeting of the year, which involved a lot of preparation, presentations, and traveling. That first night, my husbands parents took him to eat a fancy steak dinner while I was stuck in the hospital eating cafeteria food and playing hostess to15 or so unannounced visitors who all showed up at the same time. They might have difficulties controlling their emotions and be prone to anger or violent behavior when drunk. TAKE A SHOWER NOW!!! Yeah. 5. I could barely walk for a week after the c section, my normal recovery time for that is two days. Here is a picture of him, having a little lie down with Jack about 20 minutes after he was born. All they could do was pace the floor in the waiting room. And often I wonder if this is healthy. I just looked at him and siad Seriously!?! You all left 237(!) Hes pretty lucky the epidural finally kicked in halfway through their lunch date! Be there to offer encouragement for labor and delivery. A few other symptoms are: Drinking early in the morning. I said the baby is coming now. Ive got girlfriends who pretty much just lay it all on the table. However, if you are determined to recover from it and stay sober, you can do it as long as you stay strong and focused. yep, i paint with a broad ass brush.